Banned for the being apprehended in the act of communicating via expanded and rather advanced usage of combinations of letters of the Latin Alphabet, also known as "words". You are also being banned for editting the contents of your ban. With that, I bid you adieu.

Shalom. The individual whom has affixed a vast collection of phrases prior to the one that is possessing the quality of being property of to yours truly is hereby banned for "bidding adieu," otherwise percieved as a sendoff, sans a satisfactory salutation. Cheerio. 

Banned for mentioning a religious holiday.

(Double ban for blaming someone you've never met for your relationship status.)

Banned for not mentioning the two religions that the holiday belongs to and/or was derived from. (It's Pagan & Christian)

Banning self for almost making a hypocritical ban.

Banned for self banning.

Banned for discriminating against self-banners.

Banned for not joining the self-banners if you like them so much.

Banned for having a better bio than me.

Self-banned for realizing my mistake.

Kronvullok

Banned for having a better bio than me.

Banned for bio-shaming.

Banned for thinking that's worth being noted.

Banned for not having a good enough bio.